_{PLEASE! tell me i am not the only who has increased paranoia anxiety, depression?}

Am i the only one who has increased paranoia? anxiety, depression.....i am so afraid i am just going to have a stroke, or my heart is going to give out, and the fear of car accidents, earthquakes, i was never like this before my IIH "came back" so please tell me i am not the only one i don't think i can go another day feeling so alone...honestly i am not that unhealthy of a person, i don't drink alcohol, not a drop. i stopped smoking 7 months ago, and while i am over weight, i am not that big, i don't have diabetes, or high blood pressure, and there is no history of heart disease or stroke in my family for that matter (i don't know weather or not that even matters) so what makes me think, an otherwise healthy 24 year old is going to die of something that is unlikely?!!? it must be my brain, never before has the sentence "its all in your head" been a blessing and an unwanted choice of words, if it were all in my head, only because on of IIH fine, i can deal with that. i have found that with positive thinking and prayer i have gotten better, but my mom always told me God helps those who help themselves, and obviously my constant nagging thoughts hinder any spiritual healing.....i am so thankful for everything i have i just want to be able to enjoy it....one of my favorite things to say is "oh life." that pretty much says it all.

thats me, weird starts and abrupt stops, but i think thats what happens when your brain works faster than you....oh life.

Anxiety and depression are very common with IIH, and it's not surprising you feel the way you do. When anyone is diagnosed with a Chronic or life threatening disease it makes you realise that you are not as indestructible as you thought, especially when you're young. When I was diagnosed back in 1989 and I was 20, I was paranoid that I was going to wake up and be completely blind, so I would try to stay awake for as long as I could. IT was a natural reaction after being told I could have lost my sight. When you're young your life span seems immense and you dont think about your own mortality, you take it for granted the amount of years you have ahead of you.

As IIH creeps up on you silently and seems to appear from nowhere, you question if other things will too, no matter what they are, but to put it into perspective is what you need to do when you think of these things. What is the likelihood of all these things happening to you? Take everyday as it comes and focus on the things you are doing or going to do that day, not on what can happen the day, week, month or year later, because you and I have no idea what those will hold, and to assume or think we do will stop any enjoyment of life.

You already have some positivity about your health, and you must concentrate on that, and continue with that positive thinking and prayer, as it is working for you. Concentrate on the things that bring you joy and fulfillment, and when you catch yourself slipping into darker thoughts, give yourself a shake and do something you like to do to distract yourself from them.

If you feel that it's getting out of control and you can't seem to lift how you feel no matter what you do, then it might be an idea to talk to your doctor about how you are feeling and see what he can do to help you. You are not alone in having those kind of thoughts and feelings, we all do, so don't feel so isolated by them. We are here for you.

some days are better than others, just like some days are worse, i guess what makes this all harder is that i was never like this before. it is good to know i am not alone. thanks so much for what you said, it helps, and if i ever feel down, it will help to read it again too.

You're definitely not alone! IIH can be very isolating and frustrating..it takes time to adjust because each episode or flare up seems to affect you differently. I would also like to mention that medications have affected me in very bad ways, so make sure you're keeping your doctor informed if you noticed changes after starting a medication. You have to find a way to stay positive, so surround yourself w/ your favorite people, places, or things. Make sure you keep the lines of communication open and get help if you don't feel like you can manage or your thoughts become consuming. You can get through it, so hang in there!!!


Julie